Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
