Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
