You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
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If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
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I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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