If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
