why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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