I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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