But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Randomize
