Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Success! We fucked roommates!
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
