your thong is hanging out like whoa
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
