I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
