do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
