Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize