a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
