Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize