oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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