plz talk dirty to me
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Randomize
