Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
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I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
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I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
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