So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
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I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Hello my rib-scented angel!