I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Randomize
