you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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