i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
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