I think scott just propositioned me for sex
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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