Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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