my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize