bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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