I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize