So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
