Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
