quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
