Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
