Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
