Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
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