I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
