thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
