i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
