im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
