Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
There's always time for handjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
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