Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I have grass duct taped all over my body
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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