She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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