Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
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I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Help. Why am I so naked?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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