I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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