This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize