Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize