angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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