K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Randomize