Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Randomize
