yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Randomize
