$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
