the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
