if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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