Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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